My first and (hopefully) last despair blog...

To say that it has been a difficult week would be an understatement. I feel like I  keep being hit with one thing after another, and I can't seem to move forward or get anything done.

I would like to share that last Monday my father passed away. We did not have a typical relationship, and have been estranged for many years, so I have been sorting through some difficult emotions. I haven't been sleeping well; but for the past few days, I have been better about not thinking about it all the time.

When I met with Dr. Zamora about my thesis project last week, she advised that I concentrate on gathering information and reading, and to save the writing/ proposal development for later. I agree. So I spent some time this past week looking into possible sources, printing articles, and highlighting.

I was feeling more optimistic about making progress, but yesterday I was hit with more bad news (not nearly as bad, but still.. at this point, I really can't take anymore stress). The Independent Study that I needed this semester in order to meet the credit requirement for my Grad Assistantship was denied. Twice.

I don't really know what my options are at this point... It's almost October. And I already denied my student loan at the beginning of the semester. Can you even get a student loan with only 6 credits?

Anyway, I'm going to end my despair blog. I need to think about what I can do to possibly resolve this situation. And then hopefully I can get back to thinking about research.
    

Week One: New Ideas

This past summer, I thought a lot about what direction I want my thesis to take. I also thought about how all of these new ideas that I was coming up with would either harmonize or clash with the thesis concept that I came away with last semester.

I know that I definitely want to study fanfiction and fanfiction writers. Initially, my proposal leaned toward juxtaposing fanfiction with the source material that inspired it: the young adult novels that would serve as my source texts. One of the major goals of my project was to demonstrate the ways in which these fan writers are able to transform and authenticate the published stories that they write about.

Now, I am leaning more towards studying the fan writers themselves. I am interested in the ways in which collaboration occurs in these fan communities. I am also interested in how reader input influences the way that these writers write. These communities are tightly woven, and the writers and readers form relationships that I think are unique and worth studying.